Monday, October 1, 2012

sick days, motherhood, and strength

**Caution: this post contains poop. Not for the faint of heart**

Hattie and I stayed home from church yesterday.  {Ask me how confused I am about what day of the week it is. I was so hoping early this morning that it was Sunday again, but alas, a Monday. A send-the-daddy-off-to-work day. Hattie wasn't happy about him leaving.} Baby girl was sick. Diarrhea sick. We woke to a change the sheets and put the baby straight in the tub mess and trudged on from there.
The odd thing was that she didn't seem like she felt like dirt. She seemed okay, except for her skin - which was painful, poor dear. Stomach virus or food allergy? I don't have a clue, but so far today she's better.
After getting her in bed last night, I confessed to Emery that the hardest struggle of the day hadn't been the many icky diapers, the diarrhea smell, or figuring out what to feed her. No. It had been trying to take care of myself and the wee bairn in the process.
Since we started Hattie on solid foods, she has always just eaten what we eat. All day, everyday. This has worked great up until yesterday. Everything we usually eat is on the do-not-give list for sick tummies. And I scarcely had the heart to sit down and eat something chock full of protein (mostly via dairy), and watch her longing eyes. So I didn't. Thankfully, Emery brought lunch home after church, that made life so much easier. It's kind of amazing the blessing of not having to prepare food when you've got a sick child (or a newborn!)
As far as I can recall, this is the first time I've kept Hattie home from church because she's been sick, and this is the first she's had any kind of tummy-bug. Thank you, LORD, for healthy immune systems!

Sometimes my mind runs all to pieces with hypothetical situations. The 'what ifs' and the 'how would I reacts' could keep my occupied for hours. I came across this birth story on pintrest last night, and I cried with the mama as she learned of her newborn daughter's down syndrome and the enormous change that their life would undergo. And I wondered, what if it were me? Would I grieve the loss of some of my hopes and dreams for the child's life or could I unquestioningly adore my newborn child and dream of his/her unique potential? I'm not sure.
I got rather sucked in to Enjoying the Small Things, from which the birth story sprang, and to see the pictures of their beautiful little daughter....all I could think was "She's beautiful". You can see her down's syndrome, but you can see an inquisitive mind too and a little girl who is enjoying learning about life everyday.
Those sweet pictures give me hope that if ever faced with such a situation, I could embrace the adventure before me and do the life dance just a little bit differently.


  1. I'm sorry Hattie was sick! I'm sure it was an exhausting day for you. I'm thankful she seems to be feeling better today.
    I've read that birth story before, but I enjoyed reading it again. I was just thinking yesterday about a similar situation. With our first ultrasound coming up in a few weeks, I was thinking about the "what ifs" of discovering something was wrong with our baby. Would I mourn over shattered dreams and possibilities? Or would I stay strong and praise God even so? I would like to think I could be one of those people who, like the Shunamite woman in 1 Kings, says "it is well." But I fear the reality of my weaknesses.

    1. "But I fear the reality of my weaknesses." -- whew! That's the truth!!

  2. I hope Hattie gets well soon! You sound like a great mother and good luck with the one on the way!

    Jaren took work off on Friday, so I totally know what you mean by "send-the-daddy-off-to-work day" being horrible. It's so nice to have that little extra help :)

    1. Thanks Elisabeth! Hope your baby gets to feeling better soon too!

  3. I hope Hattie is feeling much better as the day progresses. Give her a kiss for us! Love you all!